Defining Moments. My friend has a blog called defining moments. They are profound words. To me they mean “a sharp,shaping event; one that alters your view of the world – an unforgettable learning experience” It can be for good or bad. I have been thinking about some of my defining events and what I learnt;
1. Sunrise and a New Day – as a young officer, I remember sun rise after a long and harrowing night in enemy territory. It was a defining moment. I promised myself to celebrate each new day, acknowledging it as an opportunity to live fully. I sometimes think of the words of John Cougar Mellencamp describing how life becomes grey, blurred, slipping past – same old, same old; – “life goes on but the joy of living is gone” An extract from my journal was “If it will not kill or wound – fear not, be brave.” LIVE while you have LIFE. WELCOME EACH DAY.
2. Physical Well-Being – I had a quadriplegic girlfriend. She broke her neck diving into a wave and had not ventured back into the sea until one morning, I took her out on my surfboard – a calm, glassy day and we surfed together. It was a tremendously emotional and a healing time. That relationship was a defining moment because being physically healthy is as good as it gets. There should be nothing else to complain about. Being really sick or physically challenged puts trivial worries into perspective. HEALTH IS NO 1.
3. I CAN do it – in 1997 my company turned over its first million. That was a defining moment. Many said I was mad to go it alone, and yes, the economy was shrinking, the country in revolt and hey, as the naysayers said; what did I know about business? Being successful is great, but it involves trade offs and a never ending commitment. My diary at that time had a note – “Funny, the harder I work the luckier I get” COMMIT FULLY TO WHAT YOU VALUE AND DREAM, BE BOLD.
4. Shit, this is NOT as good as it gets – in 2009 I discovered a completely different way to live life. It was a struggle for me to embrace at first, being diametrically opposed to how I have been programmed from birth to live – A defining moment. I realised another much finer world exists and I am moving fully into it. What that defining moment taught me? BE INQUISITIVE, TAKE RISKS. DON’T LIMIT YOURSELF… as Mulder said in the X Files; “The truth (for you) is out there”.
5. Betrayal – A strong, trusting business relationship shattered some years ago, almost landing in court. It cost me my company, dear friendships and almost my marriage. I was bitter and trusted no one for many years. A defining moment for me, although it shaped a dark journey. Time is a great healer. TRUST IN YOURSELF. ALWAYS.
6. Manifestation – you get what you wish and the clearer your wish is – the better your chance of getting it. I have been practicing this for years without realising it. When I twigged that this stuff ACTUALLY works; it was a defining movement. I learnt to be mindful in its practice – if your wish is unclear, you get an unclear outcome; sort of, not quite, often with unwelcome and unexpected side effects. If it is a dark picture; beware. My first manifestation was dark and shook me to my core. BEWARE WHAT YOU WISH FOR and DO NO HARM IN YOUR WISHES.
What are your defining moments and what did you learn?